BluE Scrubs

A few times, I have tried giving this friend of mine a name. You know like, a clever enough nick names like Dr. Vagina or Dr. Bowels. Something that bears no resemblance to their real name but very much describes who they are relative to the people around them, or to what they do.

I could use so many like Miss Tinggi – she sometimes wishes that she’s not that tall so she doesn’t scare Malay men away;

Miss Sporty- we never missed playing netball for Southampton team every Nottingham games, even though it was 2 years after we have left the medical School. For the 3 years we were final years, (again and again) and still some ‘babies’ came up to us and said
‘are you guys first years as well?’ followed by a big ‘first year’ grin. And we would say yes, naturally.

Miss Sangat Baik- On my birthdays, she’d be the one organizing things to happen right on time, rightly subtle, like that year when Cik T was here for the graduation. But oh well, just how do you look surprised?

Miss Honest – She’d put up with my wittering , blabbering and compulsive fits secondary to the opposite sex which at the time caused me a lot of heartaches. But she’d put things in perspective which put me and my wonky head straight. True what she said but boy it hurts.

Miss Caring- I remember the time I was hit by a car on the way back from med school and was brought back to the med school. You see, if you are clever you’ll spot that my school was also a hospital. Aaaaahhh. See? Now how many people can make people confused like that? Anyway, for many days she looked after me and treated me like her own sister. On the bedside in A&E I heard something like ‘Pleaselah janganlah mati, please please please’, which I thought was sweet. Had my eyes closed all the time.

So, I have all those options but I am going to go for Dr. Chemo because, she’s now passed all her exams, she’s a 2nd boss ; Registrar that is in our lingo. In couple of years she’ll be a chemotherapy specialist. What scares me is just how is she going to get a man when she says ‘Saya kerja apa awak tanya ya? Saya pakar chemotherapy’,

when before, when we say ‘Saya kerja apa? Saya doktor’ men usually stop being themselves and talk funny and then just leg it. BUT, for 12 years being friends with her, these days I am at my proudest being a friend.

So, Dr. Chemo rang me and said that she’s coming to cook some Rendang, lots of staying in because the weather is pants, going to the movies because it’ll be warm, waking up late because it’s Sunday, English breakfast because we both missed our boarding schools, cold walk by Cleethorpe ‘beach’ because we always torture ourselves like that in the cold; either that or a jog in the rain, and a coffee in Strabucks, because we love it. Couldn’t be bad, couldn’t wait.

So I was tidying up my room, hoovering my living room, scrubbing my bathroom, mopping my kitchen- why didn’t I just say tidy my flat. And I found this little magic chant. I thought this will be good for the girls having binged during this festive season and still want continue to do so but also want to remain perfectly slender.

It’s called ‘A SPELL TO MAKE FOOD SLIMMING’

“ I call upon a Fairy’s Magic Power,
To fall on me in a shimmering
shower.
Let me eat as much as I wish,
Emptying every delicious
dish.
But as the next day doth come,
Keep me thin around my thighs and
bum”

I found many more like a spell to look sexy, a spell for thinner waist even a spell for
Revenge on a Love rat. Which will definitely be shared in good time.

p/s: Dr. Chemo is single.