Tuesday, August 23, 2005
The Same Stubby Man
Before they gone bonkers.
The other day Dr.Vagina and Dr.Bowel both senior house officers in their own world, dragged me out for mid week chill out session. I have been working flat out both weekends and have been slacking with keeping in touch with the ‘real world’.
Buzz off to them meant ‘Come drag Naj out of her sweatpants and PowerPuff baby tee covered hot chocolate stains and see if she has enough energy to Belly Bananza’. The magic word was Thai food, so they won.
Over Thai green curry Dr.Vagina’s Sony Ericsson kept beeping an incoming message which sounded very much like mine. So apart from getting disappointed every time it beeped, I was also annoyed with that cheesy grin he kept doing. Dr. Bowel and I busy bodied trying to dig out who sent what to him. We didn’t think he was that popular you see.
He showed us in the end. Let’s put it this way, he'd be silly to think he'll win against a woman who is a zorro with needles of all shapes and sizes and another who slashes guts for a living.
It reads:
‘Of course, me against the wall and you take me from behind. Hurry please’ –A
Dr. Bowel’s jaw dropped to the table. Who who who???
Just one of the nurses on B6 he said as a matter of factly while rising eyebrows of do-you-want-the –rest-of –that-rice towards me.
Dr.Bowel grunted about the unfair world at work. The male doctors get all the fun loving attention and us female ones get all the mardiness from the hormone drenched menopausing ones. Which is true but probably more so on the wards.
Negating the statement, I was compelled to tell them about what happened to me the day before my birthday this year which really made me think twice before smiling to any male NHS staff. Everybody is after one thing.
That day in the operating room 3, I was finishing off an orthopaedic case. As usual the radiographer, approached me for my signature for the x-ray form as I was the only doctor in the room not scrubbed up. I signed, dated it, and fill in the bit that says bleep number.
That’s a nice number he said. Yes it is I said not thinking much about it. You know, he said, I have seen you around a lot. Half surprised and half flattered, I replied Oh yes, I don’t think I have seen much of you, which was rude I thought but true. I barely notice people when they are in scrubs and not one of these two people. My ODA and my Consultant.
Can I bleep you sometime? He blurted out. I was perplexed as my loser radar started beeping feintly but I was being professional and said yes of course, if you have to.
Mistake no.1.
I swear he was smiling from ear to ear.
So I got home, was about to jump into the bath when the bleep went. It was Chris asking for the pin code for the on call room. Tried again to get into the bath, a beeping again. Did say to Chris that bleep again if the number doesn’t work because I hardly used the on call room and my memory is not what I would rely on half of the time. Thought it was him again you see.
It was the radiographer. Now clearly it was just a social call. I was well annoyed and surprisingly it didn’t get to him.
The silence didn’t make him uncomfortable at all and he asked what I was doing later. I said ASDA to get some things as some people from work were coming to my apartment the next day. I’ll come with you he said because that’s what exactly he was going to do. Oh yeslah? What a coincident!
Giving him the benefit of the doubt I said he can come with me in my car thinking that that’s what he’s after. Free ride, I have no problem as long it’s not out of the way. Mistake no.2.
So fast forward to the yogurt isle, I was bending over to pick up a Muller light when suddenly felt cold hands touching my waist.
1.cold hands
2. my waist
You see cold hands means he lifted up my top and slipped his hands and where? My waist!!!!!
I was startled and nearly whacked him with the 2 pint milk in my other hand.
He apologized and flustered trying to explain.
“You see Naj, I have never seen somebody as beautiful as you and you’re the nicest person I have ever met. I love you the first time I set eyes on you 4 months ago.”
At that point Dr. Bowel barfed out a loud shriek. He said that Naj???
He’s short? Black guy? Has goatie? Bald?
Yes yes yes yes I said completely excited. You know him?
He said that to me as well laaaaaaaa!!! What????
Dr. Vagina of course was rolling on the floor, literally.
I was completely lost and speechless.
Told them I left him in ASDA and hopefully he found his way home.
Naj you can be such a blonde sometimes, Dr Bowel comforted me in her own kind words and Dr. Vagina recovered from his laughing at Naj session.
Dr.Vagina soon realized the Carling wasn’t enough to take the amount of man bashing and grief we gave him whole night until we got to Silk, then Fiddler and ended up in Winter Garden when he was completely pissed and then only we thought it’s enough.
p/s: we didn't expect to see so many ugly looking men wearing so little clothes with thongs sticking out so much hair, but hey the women loved it.
Winter Garden, they have now gone bonkers.
The other day Dr.Vagina and Dr.Bowel both senior house officers in their own world, dragged me out for mid week chill out session. I have been working flat out both weekends and have been slacking with keeping in touch with the ‘real world’.
Buzz off to them meant ‘Come drag Naj out of her sweatpants and PowerPuff baby tee covered hot chocolate stains and see if she has enough energy to Belly Bananza’. The magic word was Thai food, so they won.
Over Thai green curry Dr.Vagina’s Sony Ericsson kept beeping an incoming message which sounded very much like mine. So apart from getting disappointed every time it beeped, I was also annoyed with that cheesy grin he kept doing. Dr. Bowel and I busy bodied trying to dig out who sent what to him. We didn’t think he was that popular you see.
He showed us in the end. Let’s put it this way, he'd be silly to think he'll win against a woman who is a zorro with needles of all shapes and sizes and another who slashes guts for a living.
It reads:
‘Of course, me against the wall and you take me from behind. Hurry please’ –A
Dr. Bowel’s jaw dropped to the table. Who who who???
Just one of the nurses on B6 he said as a matter of factly while rising eyebrows of do-you-want-the –rest-of –that-rice towards me.
Dr.Bowel grunted about the unfair world at work. The male doctors get all the fun loving attention and us female ones get all the mardiness from the hormone drenched menopausing ones. Which is true but probably more so on the wards.
Negating the statement, I was compelled to tell them about what happened to me the day before my birthday this year which really made me think twice before smiling to any male NHS staff. Everybody is after one thing.
That day in the operating room 3, I was finishing off an orthopaedic case. As usual the radiographer, approached me for my signature for the x-ray form as I was the only doctor in the room not scrubbed up. I signed, dated it, and fill in the bit that says bleep number.
That’s a nice number he said. Yes it is I said not thinking much about it. You know, he said, I have seen you around a lot. Half surprised and half flattered, I replied Oh yes, I don’t think I have seen much of you, which was rude I thought but true. I barely notice people when they are in scrubs and not one of these two people. My ODA and my Consultant.
Can I bleep you sometime? He blurted out. I was perplexed as my loser radar started beeping feintly but I was being professional and said yes of course, if you have to.
Mistake no.1.
I swear he was smiling from ear to ear.
So I got home, was about to jump into the bath when the bleep went. It was Chris asking for the pin code for the on call room. Tried again to get into the bath, a beeping again. Did say to Chris that bleep again if the number doesn’t work because I hardly used the on call room and my memory is not what I would rely on half of the time. Thought it was him again you see.
It was the radiographer. Now clearly it was just a social call. I was well annoyed and surprisingly it didn’t get to him.
The silence didn’t make him uncomfortable at all and he asked what I was doing later. I said ASDA to get some things as some people from work were coming to my apartment the next day. I’ll come with you he said because that’s what exactly he was going to do. Oh yeslah? What a coincident!
Giving him the benefit of the doubt I said he can come with me in my car thinking that that’s what he’s after. Free ride, I have no problem as long it’s not out of the way. Mistake no.2.
So fast forward to the yogurt isle, I was bending over to pick up a Muller light when suddenly felt cold hands touching my waist.
1.cold hands
2. my waist
You see cold hands means he lifted up my top and slipped his hands and where? My waist!!!!!
I was startled and nearly whacked him with the 2 pint milk in my other hand.
He apologized and flustered trying to explain.
“You see Naj, I have never seen somebody as beautiful as you and you’re the nicest person I have ever met. I love you the first time I set eyes on you 4 months ago.”
At that point Dr. Bowel barfed out a loud shriek. He said that Naj???
He’s short? Black guy? Has goatie? Bald?
Yes yes yes yes I said completely excited. You know him?
He said that to me as well laaaaaaaa!!! What????
Dr. Vagina of course was rolling on the floor, literally.
I was completely lost and speechless.
Told them I left him in ASDA and hopefully he found his way home.
Naj you can be such a blonde sometimes, Dr Bowel comforted me in her own kind words and Dr. Vagina recovered from his laughing at Naj session.
Dr.Vagina soon realized the Carling wasn’t enough to take the amount of man bashing and grief we gave him whole night until we got to Silk, then Fiddler and ended up in Winter Garden when he was completely pissed and then only we thought it’s enough.
p/s: we didn't expect to see so many ugly looking men wearing so little clothes with thongs sticking out so much hair, but hey the women loved it.
Winter Garden, they have now gone bonkers.
