Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Thank you Sir.

I wonder how people cope with nomad-ing around ever so often when it comes to working.

Imagine that you arrive at a new place, you over come that deep apprehension towards strangers barrier, stop scrutinizing yourself so much and start conversing with people and very soon you’re on a first name basis already.

You start talking about families, relationships and deep stuff at work, because it’s only natural. You bond with people at work. Sometimes, with the boss as well, and as you are settling comfortably into a place where people know your name, it’s time to leave again.

This consultant I worked with today, I will just call the Prof. He’s somebody, who will always ask you the most simple question, which you should know the answer to really because you use the damn thing everyday, but because it was so obvious, you can’t put in words.

I found myself swallowing air while waiting for the answer to meteorite into the atmosphere and hit me hard on the head, so much so that I felt like being rude - burp and faint at the same time. Got it in the end.

Maybe he finds me such an anaemic 80s cartoon character who looks more and more exasperated each day with the workload and trying to study for the exam at the same time, that he sent me off the OR today. I swear I could have kissed him there and then. Thank you Sir, awak sangat baik hati.

Earlier in the anaesthetic room, it was a good hour of sheer perseverance. We first put the thoracic epidural, then gas the patient down, put the double lumen endotracheal tube which position was confirmed with the fibreoptic bronchoscope.

The damn thing had mind of it’s own I tell you, and I don’t know what is it with me being watched by the consultant and doing things the opposite. Right, I mean left…left I mean right.

I managed to confuse my left side to my right so much, that I had to stop doing a running commentary while doing the bronchoscope, as initially demanded.

Describe to me what you see, he said.
Matter was made worse with Bill the ODA opening his daily dose of jokes on women. So today was on women drivers.

Did a subclavian cannulation for feeding later, as this patient was not going to eat for a while after his oesophagectomy for cancer. That was a bit of a struggle. Arterial line next and he was ready to cook. Chuffed!!

What a great joy it brings to describe mutilating a person when he’s asleep, because that’s what it basically is, but I shall not dwell on that.

I left after being sent away to hit the books which I did. Was going to decapitate the skeleton in the seminar room to study the anatomy of the base of the skull and the orbit (eye) but unfortunately it’s been fixed with some partially rusted screws which probably could do with a bit of grease.


My question is how often am I going to use the knowledge of the position of the jugular foramen in relation to the foramen magnum and how foramen spinosum and foramen ovale almost look like one foramen? Huh? Huh? Huh?

I’ve grown to like this place, the people, the air, the water. I was sceptical at the beginning, I called it grim, but it’s not the place that matters, it’s what you make out of the place.

I dread August, where will I be, what would I do? Not a single thing to look forward to on the horizon. Not a thing to call mine. It’s got to be the end, it’s all over. I am saddened

Damn, on call tomorrow and got no clean socks!

Fighting.back.tears.BluEScrubs.

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