Sunday, March 06, 2005

Note To Self

Hmmppphhhh!!!! Posted by Hello



This is so cliché but am going to spell it out anyway because have been spending too much time trying to make it sound clever, but brain is just a blueblackened banana at the moment

- T.R.U.S.T is the most important thing to survive a relationship, and I agree with two hands up in the air.

Without trust, you kill each other quietly, slowly but surely and it, by that I mean the relationship will not go very far. It is not to be asked, so be careful asking, it has to be earned. Same as respect and if circumstances allowing and time is on your side, this is just a piece of cake, but if it is not, then just G.I.V.E it. Make it easy on yourself.

What is there to lose if you really love the person? Worse comes to worse, you later find out that he’s a jerk or she’s a bitch, then you will know either way, and you’ll come out of it a better lover, hopefully. Do remember to abandon the relationship though.

Second is, the garbage, spare tyre, kerak-kerak, saki baki from previous relationships, that has to be wrapped up well with no return address and thrown into a river, any river would do, preferably the one without any living organisms because you never know, the weight or the toxicity might harm some aquatic creatures.

It doesn’t help anybody I tell you, neither does it make it any saucier to argue about the past, because apart from it making who you are now, it’s also what you have learnt to dealt with. The past IS you, so learn to accept each other. Start fresh and mean it.

Give each other leeway and cut some slacks. Important this. Everybody needs their own space, from time to time. Needs to retreat into a cave somewhere, to read a book, to reflect, to think, to find solutions, to find self. Especially if both are intense people.

This is when being opposite works. When argument break lose, one must be the fire extinguisher. No good trying to make the other person listen when he/she is talking because listening and talking never happen simultaneously. You need to be quiet to listen.

Lastly, what you want to be done to you, do it to him/her. If you want to be listened to, listen first. To be spoken to nicely, be kind and speak with your heart. But if he/she is just too self absorbed to notice the give, then sod it. Not worth fighting for, not worth your time, attention, and energy.

So, all those 4 points are just something that hit me in a mystic kind of way while cooking. No sheep or chicken (apart from that one in the oven) were involved and of course not related to anybody dead or alive. I do get this relationship itch I call it and when it does come on, I just have to write in a bluescrubby kind of way.

Who am I to say this and that. After all I am the one who’s chronically unlucky in love. Enuff said.

p/s: T-Rex, it's been 6 years since I last saw you, I wish you well. Wherever you are.
SELAMAT HARI JADI.

Emotionally.disturbed.BluEScrubs.

Comments:
After all these years, I can still shed some tears...

I've never felt more sorry to anyone else in my entire lifetime, and at this junction of my mid life, will probably never be.

There are no rivers for me. Letters are memoirs of my past and reminders of my life and love.

I have lived and I have loved from 1994-1999.

More than words can say, i am so sorry.. for all your misery.. i am so sorry.

-I was here 2006 December 5th crying for you-
 
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